exploited wrote: Spider wrote: exploited wrote:
Spider wrote:I say let someone else have a crack at it. The straights have turned it into a joke. Divorces for $99 online.
It's just a simple and unavoidable truth that at least 75% of humanity should not marry. The less important of a social institution it becomes, the better for relationships overall.
Most certainly true.
If you have ever been divorced, it means that you aren't fit for marriage. That's just a fact. When I say this people are always like "But what about people who jumped into it or married a person who turned out to be totally different or abusive or cruel?" And my response is the same: it's proof that you aren't fit for marriage. Because marriage has a very specific function, in my mind, and that is to provide an emotionally healthy, lifelong, loving relationship, based upon total acceptance and understanding of your partner, with absolutely zero possibility of ever ending in divorce. So if you got married to someone who abuses you, or married to someone you barely know, or married to someone you can't negotiate and compromise with, no matter what, then it follows that you do not have the emotional or mental maturity/stability/development to get into a relationship of that nature. And absent changing who you are to a drastic degree, which most adults cannot do, that will always be the case.
Based on that, we know that 60-65% of people who marry shouldn't have married. We also know that at least half of all marriages are unhappy or involve regular, persistent cheating. Not hard to get to that 75%.
Some people simply fall victim to false advertising, though. I've seen that. Someone gets married to someone they've been with for months, and then that person changes...like a switch being thrown. Suddenly the sweet, caring fun girl you married has cut her hair off, gained 40 lbs, and starts bitching and complaining at you all day, entitled to this, demanding that. Happened to a buddy from college. He got out before there were any kids, thankfully. Another example is a guy who started hitting this girl who used to work at our office. That guy had been to our place on several occasions, socially he went with us on a weekend long fishing trips, seemed a pretty decent sort. Shy, quiet, reserved, bit nerdy, really. But damn if he didn't start slapping her around within two months of the wedding after over a year of living with her.
So shit happens. We can't blame people when others so completely misrepresent themselves.